Career rediscovery: Erin's journey

Moving to Buenos Aires with my husband was my second international relocation, driven by my husband’s career, so I knew what to expect. There’s always the initial period of excitement as you wonder what this new adventure will bring, but it is also accompanied by a deep sense of loneliness. You can’t help but feel like an outsider when you move to a new country. Yet, when I arrived in Argentina from the US, I wasn’t prepared for the loss of identity that I would feel as I struggled to fit in.  

I love the expat life. I have had the privilege of traveling to some interesting places and meeting wonderful people along the way. I don’t mind supporting my husband in his career aspirations, but with this move, I felt that my identity had been stripped away because I suddenly felt like ‘Mark's wife’. Yes, I was married, but I never felt defined by my marital status. A wife, yes, but also a career woman.  Before embarking on the expat-spouse journey, I had a successful career as a trader at a top investment bank in New York.

And we left the US and moved to Argentina, I was no longer a career woman. I had hoped to continue my finance career, but that didn’t work out. Forget culture shock. For me, the biggest shock was that I didn’t have a job anymore. What happened to my career!? Work was always a big presence in my life – it was part of who I was. And then suddenly, it wasn’t. It was like losing a huge part of my identity: Who am I, if I’m not Erin the career woman?  

With the loss of identity, came the resentment: am I just an Expat Wife now?    

I heard myself jumping at every chance I got, to tell people that I used to have a career, that I did used to do something interesting, once upon a time. For a while I played the victim; feeling like all this change had been done to me and telling myself that I sacrificed my career and my life for my husband. I became depressed and my marriage started to suffer.  

A close friend who had worked with Nicola when making a career change, recommended that I speak with her. She explained that Nicola had also experienced the expat-wife lifestyle, and that maybe she could help me turn what was becoming a nightmare, into something fulfilling.  

I worked with Nicola for 6 months and in that time, she helped shift my mindset and rebuild my confidence so I could go after the career that I wanted and let go of the resentment I was feeling towards Mark.  

When I look back now, the work we did was simple and focused on creating new daily habits that changed my perspective. Daily breathing meditations, which I initially resisted due to an already over-scheduled life, turned out to be exactly what I needed. I discovered that I did have 3 minutes to pause, and listening to the narrator's voice was very calming. Additionally, a 2-minute gratitude practice at the start and end of my days helped build a more positive mindset without me realising it.

Nicola guided me through Intogreat’s Dare into Great programme, where I learned about the science behind the tools and approaches, she introduced. Two practices, in particular, sparked a turning point for me: the first was a tool for rewriting my limiting beliefs. This gave me the necessary space from judgment. And the second was reconnecting with my core values.  

This work helped give me the confidence to start my own business, focused on improving financial literacy for teenagers.  

If you find yourself feeling stuck, lost or yearning for more in your life, Nicola and Intogreat can definitely provide the guidance and support you need to move towards a life filled with purpose and fulfillment.