The art of digital balance

Silicon Valley tech companies make billions of dollars each day by exploiting one tiny molecule we just can't get enough of. I'm talking about dopamine, the pleasure hormone that rewards us for meeting our primary needs like eating, drinking, and procreating. Dopamine is also released when we receive a like on social media.  

Why? Our ancestors were much more likely to survive if they were well-liked by their peers and not cast out by their tribe. Being socially accepted became hardwired into our brains, and as a result, our brains now reward us with a chemical “hit” every time we are accepted by our peers – because this signals to our brains that we are safe.  

When you post a photo, receive a like, or open a news alert, your dopamine levels rise. When the chemical drops, you search for another craving or hit, which is why you compulsively check your social media channels, unable to predict when the next mouthwatering like or social validation may arrive. The addictive cycle is set in motion.

Many of us experience FOMO - you know, the fear of missing out. There are two kinds of FOMO: the first is 'compare and despair,' where you believe that other people are having more fun or living a better life than you are. The second is where you're constantly checking your social media feeds in case you miss a message, email, or alert. Both eat up your time and focus and slowly chip away at the quality of your relationships. When you're constantly checking your phone, it's hard to give someone or something your full attention. You're not present and are caught up chasing things that don't exist in the real world.

So, how do we convert this new knowledge to actually feel better and break this addictive cycle?  

Limit access

The first thing to do is to limit our access to news, emails, and social media notifications. Stimulation is okay in moderation; it's just about choosing to engage with things that make you feel empowered, calm, and positive.

Social media detox

The second step is to do a social media detox and unfollow accounts or people that heighten your FOMO. What you read, watch, or listen to should help you grow or feed yourself. If it's cyber junk that leaves you feeling anxious, consider cutting back.

Get present

The third and final thing to do is to focus on being in the present moment. Try to keep your attention on one thing at a time rather than multitasking or racing ahead, planning the meeting you have coming up.

In a world of endless notifications, finding balance means choosing what truly adds value to our lives. As you embark on this journey to a more intentional digital life, remember: less FOMO, more JOMO—the joy of missing out on the noise, and embracing the quiet beauty of now.