How spending time alone can transform your life

Taking a solo trip to Japan was one of the most courageous and rewarding experiences of my life. It wasn’t just about exploring a new country—it was an opportunity to connect with myself in ways that everyday life rarely allows.  

For women in their 40s, particularly those who are navigating life outside the norm, solo travel can be both liberating and grounding. Here’s why time alone matters, and some tips on how to make the most of a solo travel adventure.

The importance of a relationship with yourself

When we think about relationships, our focus often goes to those with family, friends, or partners. However, our relationship with ourselves sets the foundation for all our connections. Just like the safety instructions on an airplane tell us to put our oxygen mask on first, cultivating self-awareness and self-compassion allows us to show up more fully in relationships with others. Knowing who we are—our values, desires, and boundaries—empowers us to interact more authentically.

In a world filled with distractions, spending intentional time alone can help us tune into our needs and gain clarity on what truly matters to us. We may often mistake being alone for loneliness or feel uncomfortable with solitude, but solo experiences encourage us to look inward and develop a stronger sense of self-worth and resilience. This was particularly true for me in Japan, where I discovered a sense of peace and confidence that I hadn’t accessed before.

Considering a solo trip? Here’s where to start

If you’re considering solo travel, here are some things to keep in mind to make the experience both fulfilling and safe:

1. Set an intention for your trip: Before setting off, ask yourself what you want to get out of the experience. For me, it was about reconnecting with joy. Having an intention allows you to focus on what’s important, whether that’s self-reflection, adventure, or learning about a new culture.

2. Research your destination: Understanding the culture, language basics, and customs of your destination will help you feel more at ease. As a solo-female traveller, I also consider the safety of travelling alone. Thankfully, Japan has a high level of safety and a culture that values respect, which made solo travel a bit easier.

3. Plan (but don’t over-plan): Give yourself some structure by booking accommodations and key activities in advance but leave room for spontaneity. Some of my most memorable experiences were unplanned, like joining a karaoke night with strangers or trying sumo wrestling!

Tips for making the most of your solo trip

Here are a few ways to fully embrace and enjoy solo travel:

• Stay present and unplug: Resist the urge to constantly scroll social media or listen to something. Spend time simply observing your surroundings and noticing your thoughts.

• Challenge yourself to try new things: Stepping outside your comfort zone opens doors to new experiences and perspectives. During my trip, I attended a Japanese comedy night, which both pushed me beyond my usual activities and helped me connect with fellow travellers.

• Embrace solitude without judgment: Remind yourself that being alone is not a sign of loneliness or inadequacy. It’s an opportunity to reconnect with your thoughts, passions, and dreams, and to practice self-love.

• Connect with people along the way: Even if you’re traveling solo, you can still build connections. Engage with locals or join group activities. These experiences enrich your trip and can provide a sense of community.

Ultimately, solo travel is about honouring the relationship with yourself. Spending time alone teaches us resilience, self-compassion, and clarity, helping us grow into the best versions of ourselves.  

It’s about realising that you can be your own best friend, and that life can be uniquely fulfilling, no matter how different it looks. So, if you’re on the fence, take the leap—adventure and self-discovery await!